The Perfect Present for Everyone + Anyone in 2023

Customizable and adored by even the snobbiest snobs. (And the results of my brush cleaning quest, too.)

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If you’ve been here a moment, you no doubt know that I am deeply consumed by the desire to give really good gifts. I’m not saying I always succeed—one cannot be divinely inspired at all times—but I actively work at coming up with excellent present ideas for the loved ones in my life. And I detailed part of my process in the early days of this newsletter, in a story that really reveals my Virgo-Virgo-Scorpio weirdness, with a post entitled How To Win At Giving Presents.

While it might seem counterintuitive to talk about giving gifts in the early days of 2023, I think this is actually the perfect time to discuss the topic, as you have nearly the entire year ahead of you to destroy your friends and loved ones with your thoughtful gift giving. Even better: The present I’m recommending is one I road tested this holiday season to simply wonderful responses, and can be customized for most price points, personal tastes, and people. 

Okay okay, so what is it already? 

A bag.

But not just any bag!

A personalized tote bag that’s both timely and timeless, and absolutely certain to be used by the recipient. 

That’s not super exciting. 

Ah but it is! That’s because the bag will be filled with a selection of your favorite things, the giftee’s favorite things, or just an assortment of random delights that are overall crowd pleasers. You can theme the contents or choose full-on randomness; it’s totally up to you, your time, creativity, and budget.

I’m still reading. Barely. 

Okay let’s start with the bag. 

The base of this gift is the L.L. Bean Boat and Tote Open Top Bag, which is available in nine different accent colors, four sizes, and two different strap lengths. The medium will run you about $35, the large is basically $40, and yes, these are my two preferred sizes.

In terms of the accent color, black and the dark green are my current favorites, and I personally own a red one too. That said, many of the fashion industry insiders I know have it in the monochromatic natural, which they use for their styling kits. Also, we can fight about this, but I think the regular straps > the long straps, period.

Next thing to consider: Do you want to monogram it? 

Of course you do. You can select a single letter (sad trombone), initials (good for colleagues and your friends who appreciate the classics), or a name up to 10 characters, which is the route I usually go, but not always in the most literal sense. 

Here are some of the things I’ve monogrammed for my friends: Professor (for my friend who is, yes, a professor), NOPE (for my friend who is into privacy and wouldn’t appreciate her name or monogrammed splashed out everywhere), nicknames, FAFO (fuck around + find out), inside jokes, maiden names, a friend’s pet’s name...you get the idea. If you want something a little off color, or a brand name (Prada! Fritos! Xanax! Oh my!), L.L. Bean will reject your plan, but you could always take it to a local embroidery shop and get them to do it.

(For more ideas on what to embroider, I highly recommend reading this piece in The New York Times about the rise of the ironic (or should it be iconic?) boat tote, or just check out @ironicboatandtote on IG.)

As for the font, I personally like Times Bold, but you know who you’re gifting better than I do, ofc. 

All in, for a large monogrammed tote with shipping, you’re looking at a $53.95 gift. And this gift alone is excellent.

However, if you want to take it to another level, I suggest filling it with a handful of your favorite things. Again, you don’t have to spend heaps and heaps of money on those additional items. Just try to think of an overall theme and go from there. Most recently for the holidays, I gave some of the folks in my life personalized totes stocked with a selection of my favorite things, which I curated depending on the recipient. Here are some of the things I picked, but obviously feel free to make this your own.

-A dishy book like DeuxMoi’s Anon Please, Lessons in Chemistry by Bonnie Garmus, or a cult classic like The Best of Everything by Rona Jaffe.

-A splurge-y olive oil from a female founder, like Brightland or Baroncini.

-Barefoot Scientist’s Reboot Extra-Soft Exfoliating Foot Peel.

-A mini tube of Rare Beauty’s Perfect Strokes Universal Volumizing Mascara.

-CBD gummies from Lord Jones.

-A container of Jennifer Fisher’s Spicy Salt, though all her varieties are delish.

-Starface’s incredible Hydro-Stars pimple protector patches.

-Wine from my favorite place—Helen’s—preferably biodynamic, vegan, organic, and unfiltered.

You could do one that was all books. (Again, a theme is great here, like: all books set in Italy or a slew of Didion paperbacks.) Or maybe do one that’s kitchen themed and includes a hand-written recipe, a sweet dish towel, a great cookbook, a box of the world’s best cooking salt, fancy butter; whatever floats your boat. If your friend is deeply into astrology and tarot, you could get them Chani Nicholas’s book and some highly recommended tarot cards. THE MIND BOGGLES AT ALL THE OPTIONS. 

As for presentation, you can wrap all your little gifts or not, but either way, I think the bag looks best when filled with crinkle paper, and the presents nestled on top. After a weird amount of searching, I personally like Magic Water’s crinkle paper in light ivory, as it goes perfectly with the tote’s canvas color, but that’s just my detail-oriented crazy side talking. 

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Recently I shared that I needed a new method for cleaning my makeup brushes, confessed that I didn’t feel like doing a ton of research, and asked for submissions of everyone’s favorite products. 

There were loads of great suggestions, including the following most submitted items: beautyblender’s beautycleanser solid in unscented (also loads of folks who prefer the charcoal solid pro, but I didn’t want to invest), Cinema Secret’s Brush Cleanser (do yourself a favor and get the travel kit instead of the full-sized one, which is much less expensive, so you can see if you even like it), Dawn dishwashing soap, baby shampoo, Dr. Bronner’s Unscented Castile Soap (which was what the nurses recommended for washing pump parts in the NICU), Parian Spirit Brush Cleaner (which is what Gucci Westman of Westman Atelier uses, and lots of links to her brush cleaning tutorial), and Thrive’s Brush Hero Brush Cleansing Pad. 

I didn’t buy every single product, but I did get the little beautyblender solid, Dawn, Dr. Bronner’s, and then I mistakenly bought Sephora Collection’s Facial Cleansing Tool, thinking it was for brushes. It’s not—it’s for faces—but it was inexpensive and works great. I like the beautyblender cleanser a lot, and can recommend without reservations, but if you’re like me and don’t actually care that much about investing in this category, I thought the Dawn and the Dr. Bronner’s worked beautifully, even on my fancier brushes. 

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Okay friends, that’s it for now. As always, if you’re so inclined to share this newsletter, I’d think that’s grand. If you want to follow me on @hillarykerr, I’d love it. And if you have anything to say or ask (preferably nothing terribly mean), please drop me a note either via DM or in the comments below.

Also, I’m still working on my best workout leggings story, so if you have any favorites, please let me know below! (Exact style name is appreciate.)